Much of life doesn't make sense. Trials, most often, do not make sense when you are living through them. I know I've written about the bigger picture. And I know there is one. But when you are living through a series of trials, you'll do whatever you can to make sense of it all. I toss and turn our trials around in my brain, trying to find reason. All too often I just can't. Why would a family allow itself to fall apart over 'stuff?' Why do people lie and then think others are buying into their crap? Why are babies born to mothers who aren't ready or will abandon them while other women long, so desperately, to hold a child of their own? Why do some marriages survive while others disintegrate and fall apart? How is it that children have to be harmed before we step in to improve their life? How do some projects and obligations affect us (and those around us) so drastically? Why are people taken from us so quickly and so unexpectedly? Why do people continue to burn their bridges and never stop to think? How is it that I know this is what I'm meant to walk through and yet I'm still so tired by it all? How is it that it just never stops?
Unlike Sudoku, life doesn't make sense. There isn't a nice, neat little box filled with a logical solution. We can't re-arrange circumstances or trials, like numbers in a game, until there is a logical answer. No. All too often there are no obvious answers and nothing makes sense.
During trials I often feel eyes on me. Like living in a fishbowl, people watch to see how "that Christian" is going to react. What will she do now? What is she going to say about this trial? Huh? The truth is, I don't have the answers. I too struggle to make sense of life. I hurt too. I don't have a nice, neat 'box' that holds the solution that people want to hear. I'm sorry. I just don't. And really, you should be glad.
When people watch "that Christian," their soul is looking for Truth. They want answers for all these life questions. And while they are close, they are looking at the wrong person. Instead of looking to another human, they should be looking to The One who does have the answers; God.
The fact is life is full of trials. In the book of James, chapter 1 verse 2 says, "Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials,..." (NISB)(bold italics are mine). It doesn't say if you encounter trials, but when. And even "that Christian" faces afflictions and tribulations. No one is exempt. And life is not a game. There is no quick, nice and neat solution. These trials lead to actual, sometime unbearable, discomfort. There have been times when my body feels physically uncomfortable. I long for relief and none comes. This, too, is part of life. And dare I say that's a good thing? Because as soon as we become comfortable in this life and these trials, we stop longing for the better that lies ahead.
Only One has the answers. He is the Answer. And to Him, this all makes sense. We just have to trust that His solution is perfect.
Verses that Help:
- Proverbs 3:5
- 2 Corinthians 5:1-8
- James 1 (specifically 1:3-4)
- 2 Corinthians 1:1-12
- Isaiah 40:29-31
- Psalm 33 (specifically 33:20-22)
- Psalm 46:1-2+
- Ephesians 2:10
- Luke 1:36-37
- Genesis 15-21 (Story of Abram and Sarai) (Nothing is impossible with God - even when it doesn't makes sense.)
