Not for sympathy or pain, but to glorify Him

Friday, February 6, 2015

Pain has meaning

I have been completely humbled by the past few days of my life.  I guess I am not even sure if humble is an accurate description.  Awe? Overwhelmed? Amazed? Maybe there are no words. (Being a person who need a described "box," I struggle with this reality.) 
My pain and struggle has meaning.  For a few years - about eight - it felt like I was in a constant state of struggle, waiting, and pain.  I dealt with hurt, anger, striving to no avail, and more unknowns and questions than I thought I could handle.  Veil removed:  Life was hard.  I battled depression and anxiety at the peak of their debilitation.
But Grace has prevailed!  God is good.  I say this not to brag, but to glorify and bring hope to whatever you are facing.  Nothing is bigger than the hope and greatness of God.
Earthly life will never completely satisfy.  However, I am blessed and overwhelmed by where I am.  I have an amazing help-mate, friend, and love.  Jason and I are a pretty dang good couple.  I am happy and excited about our marriage.  We are lucky enough to get to steward three amazing children.  And the stages of life they are in are amazing.  I am loving this season of parenthood.  I deeply love our children.  We have a fabulous family. Blessed.  Our new church family is wonderful and we are excited about the mission God has for us.  Longview, oddly enough, is becoming our community.  Jason and I have had our hearts broken for this town.  I love that we are embedded here and are making meaningful relationships.  And, finally, I have a wonderful career.
I've never, ever hidden my passion for education and teaching.  It is part of my identity.  I know I am created for this.  And currently, it is taking a new shape with new opportunities to be a voice for loving and doing what is best for children.  I am beyond excited!
And so, when I arrived, this week, at the National Title I convention, I was struck and humbled by my current circumstances.  I get to travel and share ideas and strategies in education.  I get to take my experiences, couple it with my passion and profession and live on mission in our public schools.  Supported by my family and friends, I am entering a new season.  I am so excited and undeserving and grateful!  God is so good!

Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.  Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will hear you.  You will seek Me and find Me, when you seek Me with all your heart."

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